Making Love Underneath the Cherry Leaves

-Atlanta high noon-

When I was 19 I started working at a factory in Montgomery Alabama. Before that I worked at a grocery store on an Air Force base. Before that, the majority of my interaction with people where that of people in my age group, we mostly talked about college, who broke up, who hooked up with who, and life plans, nothing too vulgar or inappropriate . Well I mean we didn't have the most mature conversations but most of it was innocent. When I began working at the factory that was the first time I was around older people all the time. I was the youngest, my friend was a year older and the next age was 28 or 29. Most of everybody else was from the age range of 30-40. Needless to say I got an eye opener on life and people in general. This was the first time I was around people from diverse back grounds who didn't have to censor themselves because of their surroundings.  I was around people who not only celebrated but expected adultery. I was odd because I still had this idea that people are good and relationships and marriages were something to be respected. I was shocked to find out that all the adults did was talk about sex. The things I was exposed to in that plant at that age. I said all that because out of all the post and subjects I've discussed on this blog, never have I once wrote a post about sex. It didn't hit me until recently when I was thinking about relationships and sex. I still have the same view of sex I did when I was younger.  I thought that it might change who I was being exposed to the vulgarity that people talked about sex. I must admit that I have been a willing participated in these dirty talks. I am a very good “Shit talker” and frankly can back my shit up. I was taught by the bests, or so they claim to have been. But if I believed them doesn't it make it just as so?

So this post is about sex. What do I think about it? To be honest I’m conflicted to the serious implications of sex. My morals tell me that you should have sex only after your married and with one person for the rest of your life. However my huMAN (Notice the capitalization of man) nature wants me to put my penis in everything I can see. Free Love, I could get with it. My lines about sex are so undefined that I myself choose to practice abstains. I won’t say that I’m waiting for marriage but I’m at least waiting until I’m in a steady relationship built on trust. There is one thing I am definite about when it comes to sex and that is if I don’t trust you I damn sure will not have sex with you. Sex does mean a lot. We all try and say “oh it doesn’t mean anything it’s just sex”, but I can say for myself sex is a big deal. And to tell you the truth, by the way we all talk about it, I know it means a lot to you to. Okay this is probably the part where I lose some of you and maybe some of you will get to judging me but this is something that I want to write and me telling you my opinion on this subject may be the only real reason I decided to make this post about sex. When it comes to sex it’s deeper than mashing our sex organs together. I’m not a virgin by far. I’ve had sex a quite a few times. Not particularly with a lot of women but constantly when I was having sex. Sex to me is mental. I like to have great sex. That sex when you feel connected before even connecting (did you see what I did there?). That sex when you feel as if you’re the only two people left on the planet. Have any of you ever had that kind of sex? And some might just call it making love but whatever you call it, the connection is deeper than your sex organs being satisfied.  It’s almost as if we are uploading and downloading information with that physical connects. I can remember most of my sexually experiences because my mind is always in it. I can’t seem to ever turn that off. I’m always wanting to please more and more. I’ve been disappointed before and I’ve had regular sex where we are like robots doing the motions that bring us to scarifications or lack thereof. Yawn, that sex is boring and not worth it to me. I want our souls to connect. I want it to feel like our souls have been missing one another’s soul every time we connect. Have I lost you yet? Do you think my bar is too high? Do you think its lame? Do you think it’s beautiful? Regardless this is something I desire to have in my life again. Yes I like to fuck until my limbs feel as if they are no longer a part of me, but that’s not what I’m talking about here. I’m talking about something deeper. Okay that’s basically what I have to say about sex for now. I will be making more post about sex in the future as I feel that this is the start of a beautiful beginning of a discussion on sex and all sex related subject matters i.e. porn, prostitutes, male whores, and maybe rape. I have a lot to say so continue coming back and reading.