Friday, February 1, 2013

Just Breath, Be Brave, and have No Regrets

sunsets



Happy February!! My favorite month, let’s see you have black history month, my birthday and a host of Aquarius birthdays, Valentine’s day not to mention a couple of my favorite Pisces  are born in February. I’ve decided to start my resolutions this month, I always use January as a buffer zone or a transitional phrase, or a trial run to see if I like and/or can actually do the resolution. Most of them are really goals and not really resolutions, I just want to maximize my success. Another thing I’ve decided to do with my goals this year is to write them in a form of achievements, as if it was January 1, 2014 and I was looking back at 2013 and all that I’ve done that year. I don’t know if it will work but if I think about it as already done and achieved than isn’t that the same as willing it done?, Law of Attraction, it’s also in the bible so I figured it couldn’t hurt. So with all that being said I guess you imagined that this post was going to be about my resolutions?  Or maybe black history month?  I’m actually writing about something different and maybe my theme of this year, which I think will be “No regrets”. Which I rarely ever have them but sometimes I hold back when I know I can go harder. So this year I won’t regret any choices I make, I’ve decided to listen to my heart and be brave. Sometimes in life when we’re faced with a decision we’re overwhelmed and a bit anxious, I know I do. I’ve had a panic attack or two in my time. I just know that if I go by the track record of my life no matter what I’m faced with at the time, no matter what obstacle I’ll have to get over everything will be just fine just like it always has been. I remember one time I was going to get an i.d. made because my license had been suspended. I went through the whole process of filling out the paper work and smiling for my picture and they actually printed my I.D. out. Right before the guy was about to give me my i.d. he stopped and said that the big guy in charge wanted to see me. I really didn’t think anything about it, silly me. I foolishly went to the back of the building (which was packed with police officer) into this guy’s office. When I entered he was on the phone and just pointed for me to sit down. I sat down and the guy who escorted me left and shut the door behind him, still not thinking anything about it I’m just sitting there twiddling my thumbs. He put the phone on speaker phone and when someone answered he told them that they had someone down here and they need to send a county car because he has a warrant for an unpaid ticket. Oh hell, now I’m sweating, mind going a million miles an hour trying to figure out what ticket and how much it was and how the hell am I going to get out of here. My first instinct was to talk, so I started talking and asking a bunch of questions and he wasn’t budging. The only thing that was saving me some time was they didn’t have any squad cars to come get me. So he started asking me question. Questions I didn’t want to answer like; “is someone with you?”, and “how did you get here?”, and “did you know you had a warrant?”. After answering the questions; “No nobody is with me”, “I drove my car it’s outside”, and ”No I didn’t know I had a warrant” he asked me if my license were suspended why the hell was I driving? I didn’t have an answer to give him. He just shook his head and call the county jail again. He told me the ticket was some 200 dollars. I pulled out a wad of cash and was like” look, I have it right here” (I can’t remember why I had all the money on me but I was making moves that day)”Just let me go and I’ll go pay it “this dude was not budging one bit. All I was thinking was I got to get the fuck out of here. I’m thinking up all kind of scenarios, what if I just walk up out of here? How many police did I see on the way coming back here? How many could I fight off and get to the door? Could I make it to my car? How far would I make it out of the parking lot? Will I be on the news tonight? I was looking at the windows like “can I break through that?” I was just canceling all those ideas and was thinking “naw I’m not going to jail, something is about to happen, I can’t go to jail today I got other things to do” all of a sudden it was like the heavens opened and he looked at me and was like “you can go”. I was like “What the fuck?”. He said they aren’t sending anyone to come get you and we don’t have anyone here to take you so just go but you can’t have your i.d., I tried to run up out of there before he changed his mind. He walked with me to the front door and a squad car pulled up and this police officer stepped out and said “Ya’ll called and said ya’ll needed me to take someone to jail” and I stopped walking and looked at him and head guy looked at me and told the police officer “naw”. He let me get in my truck with no license and a warrant and I drive off. I went and paid that ticket, and that’s an example in my life that I know everything will be alright. That wasn’t the first or the last time something like that has happened to me. Over and over again I’ve been in sticky situations and I’ve made it out just fine. I’m very thankful that I didn’t go to jail that day and every other time I didn’t go to jail or didn’t get a ticket, or didn’t get caught, or didn’t die, I’ve done some very foolish things in my life and time after time I’ve gotten second chances so I know everything will be just fine. So when you find yourself in a situation where it doesn’t seem like there’s a way out just stay calm and breathe, be brave and know that everything will be all good. Just believe.

No comments:

Post a Comment