S2: How Many of Us Have Them?

Not many things are universal, even though I think most things should be. An example would be words. Form what I know, no matter where you go in the word "blue" means "blue", "morning" means morning"  But words like "bad", and "blood" have different meaning. (Please excuse the lack of creativity In my examples I can't think right now). I feel like other things should have universal meanings too. Like the definition of love, reality, and friendship. These definitions are not even common locally. Do you know how much easier love would be if there was a universal definition. What about friendship? The definition of a good or bad friend would be automatic and crossing certain lines would have clear intentions. Which brings me to my point. What is the ultimate betrayal or wrong decision that means "We ain't gone be friends no more."? I feel like it should have a universal meaning or stance. When you do "________" and/ or"_______" (fill in the blank) it means our friendship is over. I have a couple of friendships that have stood the test of time and immaturity. But I've had a whole lot of friendships that have ended. Some ended because of something I did, but the majority was because of something they did and I always told people why we are not friends anymore. About six months ago I did this mass eviction of friends. A total over-haul in my effort to find more respect and love for and from myself. People were angry and didn't understand. I made a few mistakes the way I went about ending some of these friendships (which I later apologized for). But in the end it had to be done. Most, if not all, were pretty toxic or just unhealthy. As much as I wanted certain people I'm my life, I had to have it on my terms. I needed respect and love, and it wasn't fair to me to not receive either of them, especially from those I called my friends.



I have disagreements with people all the time. I'm a very passionate person about everything I'm involved in or care about. Friendships included. Sometimes things happen rather intentional or unintentional. Sometimes things are said and done that just happen and I feel like the situation must be talked about before things can move along. What is a situation that can not be forgiven? What is too far? What is too much? What is a deal breaker? What is "just" cause to end a friendship? What is so bad that we can't talk about it and just move on from it? I don't like liars, communication and trust is everything to me and any kind of relationship I'm in. If your a liar most likely we aren't going to be friends very long. I can tolerate it for a little while but we'll never be close. Lies about feelings are deal breakers for me. Talking behind my back is a deal breaker. Being fake not dealing with situations is a deal breaker. Disrespect (which should have a universal meaning) is a deal breaker.You may call it petty or whatever but those are the things that I care about and need I'm my relationships.

S2: The Virtues of Patients

I just don't know how much patients I'm supposed to have. What else am I supposed to learn? What else am I supposed to go through? How long am I supposed to wait? Its like I have two things driving me. one is telling me "Fuck it just settle" and the other one is saying "just be patient its coming". I'm like "damn its been coming forever when is it gonna get here?". What other "rings of fire" do I have to jump though? At this point can I just jump through them already? I mean really my life has got to be waiting on me too. It's just gotta be there. I see it but its like only a glimpse of what it is. I want it. I want it now!!

S2: Self Proclaimed Righteousness

Words have definitions. The fact that the word "definite" is in fact in the word "definition" makes me believe that their are absolute meaning for words. I'll even go as so far as to say their are universal meanings to words. Righteousness in laymen terms means correct, justified, pretty much that you know what your talking about and your always doing the right thing. But people have their on idea or form of righteousness and justifications to go with them. Who am I to discredit your righteousness and your justification of it? However who are you to put your righteousness on me. What's for you is for you, not me. I'm not sorry I don't care about the stupid ways you've decided to handle your life. But make your existence on this earth any better then mine. I don't go to church every Sunday. Because you do doesn't make me less of a believer in our heavenly father. We are human beings and we all have our stupid little rules and ways of dealing with this existence. Please don't push your righteousness on to me. Thank you in advance.

S2: P for Politics (written in Dec 2011)

I realize I should post more. I've been working on my other blog lately which I haven't posted anything yet but it has a good 6 or 7 post. I've been waiting for select time to just hit you all with an explosion of growth and personal development. I will be serving you me on a platter. In between those issues I haven't been able to think of things that I should write for this blog even though I think about yall often. I have one that I haven't posted yet (because its not finished) its about stalking or rather pursuing. But this post isn't about love, I really wanted to talk about what's going on in the world. Did yall know that the ruler of North Korea died? That's big news. His son, who is in his twenties, is in charge now. Which way is north Korea gonna sway? The old ruler ,Kim Jong II I think that's his name, kept NK under raps. You know we lost Vietnam to them right? Yeah that's "Charlie" in all those old war movies. They have nucks and all that. I'm not trying to scare anyone because the media will do that for me, but I think we should all be aware of everything that's going on in the world. Libya got rid of Gaddafi but they are still struggling over there. America talks a good game but if it doesn't have anything to do with money in our pocket we don't really care. Shame how that plays out. On another note congress just signed over our liberties as American citizens. The military can now detain American citizens for ever without being charged with anything. I watched this documentary one time about declining civilizations and we are pretty much checking off things on that to-do list. Looks like things are gonna get a lot worse before they get better. Or maybe we can say u gotta break a couple of eggs to make an omelet or you gotta destroy to rebuild. Whatever you say its about to get ugly and at least we can blame it on a black president. I mean that makes it right. Right?

S2: I've Been Keeping Things From You

I wrote a lot of post in the last 5 months and have only posted 2. I apologize but I’ve been having issues. I was going to post one of those “post” today but as I was reading over them I realized that I don’t feel the same way or would even say things the same way as I did when I wrote them. It doesn’t take away from the intent of the post or quality; I’ve just being growing a lot. I’ve been learning new ways to express my thoughts in a different manner. Instead of not posting them because of the way I feel, sometime soon I will post them all on one day. It will be the end of Series 2, and I will start again with Series 3. It’s kind of timely seeing how I started series 2 when I moved to Atlanta and I will be ending it and moving away just as soon. So in the future maybe 2 to 3 weeks I will be doing a mass post and doing away with Series 2 and beginning Series 3 in a new city

S2 Broad Street Bullying

Anybody ever been harassed by a bully? I have, I've maybe even been a bully a time or too. I think its weird, just the whole topic of bullying. People are really passionate about it now. I guess because kids are killing themselves over it now. I remember I used to justice bullying by saying we all got bullied but that doesn't make it right. I still wonder why kids are now killing themselves these days because of it. Bad parenting maybe? I’m not judging I’m just saying that maybe that’s a reason. I do know this, if I went back and got to live my childhood again, I'd fight every last one of them. No matter the outcome I wish I would have fought. If not physically at least stood up for myself, and that Includes everybody; my dad, my teachers, policeman, kids, brothers and sisters, all of them. I just saying bullying is not from kids. I have been bullied by a number of grown people as a child. I don't really have a definitive statement to make about the way I feel about bullying I just wanted to bring the subject up. I don't have a solution, nor do I have a way to make it stop, if I even want to make it stop. I was just thinking about it so I wrote about it. Maybe bullying is an issues maybe it’s not. I don't know how much I care. It's been a long time since I've been bullied. I’m used to standing up for myself. Might not be the best idea always but at least I can sleep at night knowing that I have my self-pride.

S2: Stalkery A Form of Flattery? Entry II of III

As in my last post I will be discussing love/relationships. This post also has to do with Hollywood's portrayal of love stories. I asked a question one time; can any form of stalking be a form of flattery? Having been stalked and having had my privacy violated, I want to be careful not to justify all forms of stalking but I wanted to pose the question from the stand point of pursuing a women. How much "finding out information", if any, is too much? In my mind finding out any information is a little creepy. I guess I should come up with a scale. That way I or you can say "finding out my phone number without me telling you is an 8 on the "creepy" meter". For those of you who don't know what creepy means, it means scary or inappropriate. So what is too much? Last names? Jobs? Hangout spots? Likes? Dislikes? Web pages? Schools? Ex's? Addresses? Or is it just anything that hasn't been told to you? I always think about the movie "Love Jones" when it comes to this subject. Lorenz Tate's character pursues Nina Long's character in my eyes as the most stalking way I've ever seen. Actually getting her address and going to her home. Nia Long’s character Instead of being terrified and calling the police let's this guy that she doesn't really know, in her house and thus the movie’s love story is born. I don't know if people think about that. But that was really something that really stuck out to me. Had that not of happened the movie would of never been. She rejected his every advance before that time. These are the movies that we were raised on. If your parents never taught you how to approach a women this would be your example and you would think it was ok to advance a women like this. Or is this the way that women want to be approached? Man that's scary to me. My sister has one time to tell me some crazy dude came to her house after she turned him down. Don't ya’ll remember "Player's Club" how that guy followed Diamond home and told her he was just making sure she got home safe Like he does every night. What's the difference? Is it cute to find out where you work and send flowers? These are real questions to me I want to know where the line is. I know where I stand on these questions but where does everyone else stand? And shouldn't it be universal answers? You think about it I know what I think.